So, here I am.....

The girl that said she'd never blog. The far from computer savvy girl that is always up for a challenge despite a serious lack of time.My blog goals. Do I have blogging goals? Hmmm, I guess I should. So I pledge to be funny, lighthearted, not vent or complain to much and maybe just maybe share a crumb of wit and wisdom on occassion.I will most likely chat about etsy, my addiction and muse. the incredible artsists and friends I have found in a community that oozes with creativity, friendship, support and a home for all things handmade.You will hear me ramble about the insanity of my life including my 3 boys, ages 12, 16 and 53. Yes, that last one I am married to, but trust me, he is just as much boy as man. After 17 years of marriage I find myself raising him along with them. Then again, he would probably say the same of me at times. I will often speak of friends I would go to the ends of the earth for and a family that more often than not defines dysfunction. Then again, I strongly believe a functional family is the stuff legends are made of.I am a lover of music of all kinds and not so much the TV ( except maybe Glee). I have an addiction to handmade glass, especially venetian and lampwork beads as well as unique pottery. I have made a concerted effort to tame my jewelry fetish with my own creations which can be seen at you haven't figured out by now, I can jabber my jaws and my fingers as if someone could care what I have to say.

Sunday, February 19, 2012

Are You a Big Bully?

I'll admit, I'm getting up there in years.  Hell, I'm inching in on half century mark.  Not sure when that happened, but it did.  I am reminded of this more often than not lately.  As we continue to watch the world change at record pace, I think it only natural to look back comparatively and relate our own experiences to that which is happening today.  It can give us compassion, empathy, perspective and a deeper understanding of what is truly important in life.
In today's world, "bully" is a hot topic.  We are facing it in every aspect of our lives.  No longer is the bully relegated to the schoolyard playground and no longer is he(or she, let's be fair) accepted as an unavoidable part of growing up.  This was not always the case.  How many of us remember the excuses that were made to explain a bully's behavior?  "oh, he's just jealous", "really, he's just intimidated by you", "if you stand up to him, he'll go away".  So often it was thought easy to outsmart the bully at his own game or after meeting his bully parent(s) that we should accept his behavior because it wasn't his fault, he didn't know better.  Was it that bullies hadn't grown up and left the playground or that we only cared when they went after innocent children?  It doesn't really matter, the fact is, they've infiltrated and in true bully fashion, want control;  of everything.
Now, don't get me wrong here.  No, I don't think bullies have been secretly breeding a mass army in a diabolical plot to take over the world.  I think we have better identified the disease and developed treatment protocols.  Wouldn't it be awesome to someday add a bully vaccine to our regularly scheduled immunizations?  What a different playground that would be for 1st graders making friends or 5th graders playing kickball.  The big question would be, how many booster shots you would need throughout life.  The truth of the matter is, we have bullies at every stage of life, in every form.  No longer is he the brawny, thug with a few petrified goons by his side.  He is the corporate investor stealing your retirement lunch money, the soccer mom who can't fathom her Johnny warming the bench, the union member fearing the inability to drive their jaguar through a blue collar community that employs them or the politician that can't get the what's in it for me question out of the #1 spot.  You see, in my opinion a bully is someone that puts themselves and their wants above and beyond anything else regardless of those around them.  Their total disregard for the impact of their actions because it's all about them.  Even if it isn't, it is at lest about them first.  The 21st century bully can be highly educated and live on the right side of the tracks.  Coercion are their fists and intimidation their posse.  Bottom line is, they still want your lunch money before your head goes in the toilet for the proverbial swirly.
We can't afford to live this way.  We can't continue to isolate ourselves with iPods and internets and big overgrown great rooms.  We are humans.  We need social behaviors to survive as a species.  We need to see the impact our actions have on others.  We need to witness remorse from a wrongdoer and the celebration of a winner.  By nature we need support ,encouragement, and the bond of family.  It's what separates us from the wolves.  It's what makes soldiers strong and keeps firefighters alive.  Cops know it, championship athletes know it, musicians know it. It permeates the thoughts of our traditional heroes for a reason.  It goes beyond "I".  There is a greater good achieved when the "ayes" are because of the "we". 
Now, I'll let you in on a little secret.  The magic that makes this all work is when it's done because you believe it, not because you're told it.  Believe in the power beyond your own skin.  Believe in the greater good.  Invest in something other than that which benefits "you".  The reward will be greater than any you can imagine, and here's another secret, it's bully prevention (okay, maybe that's not such a big secret, but it's true, nonetheless).

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